I told her I am willing to counsel, give her all space needed, take a stoning verbally and since I did what I did physically if that is what is necessary from her family members individually and as group. I have to be patient, loving, and humble. I'm worried about her, i've never noticed a manic phase in her life, but now she's running from everything, house morgage etc. I stood there on the other side of that invisible security line and watched as she walked away not knowing if I would ever see her again as my wife, so I made sure to watch her every step until she disappeared into the crowd. She gives me mixed messages all of the time. Begging and pleading only makes a guy look weak in her eyes and she will be turned off by him at a deep level.
We admire you for your stand to remain faithful and true to her, no matter what may come. Whenever your wife interacts with you, she has to feel your emotional strength, not weakness. Please note that counselling will be mainly only successful if both of you go for counselling, so if your husband refuses, that will be a bad situation. Actions speak much louder than words and if the change is genuine you should never have to say that to her. Give us and myself to his mercy and oversee. I'm worried that if she is manic, will she have sex, with someone and think it's right? I never fought or was disloyal or irresponsible in maintaining a home for us. You need to draw your strength from those who can uphold you in your mission to save your marriage.
Hugs, Karen Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies Hello and welcome to HealingWell. Sometimes confession and repentance opens the fingers again. He needed to know my every move, wanted to know where I spent my money, whom I was with, where I was. I started applying the skills Coach Jack taught me and immediately began noticing results, both in connecting better with my wife, and also with others around me. .
Put old photographs and mementos away where you don't have to look at them all the time. But, they are not what is going to win her back. I have cheated and let lust get in our way. Painful as they are, these sorts of emotions are generally natural grief-related reactions to a very difficult life-altering situation. If you feel it would be helpful, I can share what humble insights I have. First, that deep down in his heart he knows himself that he has not made any adequate change over the given time. For that, Mournful Stranger, I thank you for disclosing your mistakes, shame, guilt and regret in such a public fashion.
I want nothing more then to do what God is asking and rededicated and disciplined myself. Obviously this is coming from someone who doesn't know the whole story, maybe she did try to talk to you. Cindy Wright of Marriage Missions International wrote this article. The proverbial question most psychiatrists ask is how important is this person? So, before you can do anything, you have to really know what you want and then do what is required to make that happen. If you ever get super bummed and have nobody to talk and relate to just pm me, I'd be glad to talk.
If your relationship is stable or getting worse, then help is going to be necessary unless you have other promising methods to try. I'll offer this suggestion to you. I have to be patient, loving, and humble. You both, especially your husband, need to go to marriage counselling sessions. Ask yourself… Was it her fault? Hate is actually a frustration of the drive for love; what you need to do is lose your hatred for her and concentrate on loving a healthy person who genuinely cares for your depth and principles.
Several years is a long time, however; really too long to spend exclusively grieving when life is so short. My parent came over to try to help us not get a divorce. I know most of the woman here would say I should sign my life away and give the deed. This could the hardest step for you both. In order to get that marriage for yourself, two things need to happen: 1.
I am new here and would like to share my story. This is where the let her go mindset comes in. Believe it or not there is a difference between loving your wife and cherishing her. You can't fix a problem you aren't aware of, and now that you see it you are doing something about it. We started to talk very nice to each other and thats when she ask me for a divorce. Right now, you are waiting with open arms for your wife because that is under your control.
He makes me mad, he hurts my feelings, he's not affectionate with me. The only means of communication, she has pulled. He has to sit down with you and come up with an agreed plan for his progress for change, and yes, also at a faster pace but not over pushing. I recently discovered wife has cheated on me with a co-worker. Sounds like a lot to deal with. I lost three relatives, and had to bury my dog in my backyard which she was there for.