This site will be updates with new material continuously. This will feature the stories you need to know, as well as a curated selection of the best reads from across the site. The historic mansion in Kingswear, Devon, was undergoing a £2 million renovation when a fire ripped through the eight-bedroom house overnight. And we all know that intelligent humour is probably the best humour there is. One Liners about life Sounds like its time to get that Enterprise built! I want to get the answers right but I really want to win the glasses. Every organisation is perfectly designed to get the results they are getting. They have just lost their bull.
When girls go wild, they show their tits. Patient: I think I want a second opinion. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Thank you for your letter of February 17th.
My conscience is clean — I have never used it. Please feel free to respond to my résumé on my office voice mail. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have. He explains to her why they are dam fish. Treat each day as your last; one day you will be right. Many of these funny one liners are from legendary comedians and others are from random or unknown people.
What do you call the soft tissue between a shark's teeth? That is wrong on so many different levels. But on the plus side — only three more sleeps till Christmas. Good for the planet, but scratchy. After careful consideration I regret to inform you that I am unable to accept your refusal to offer me employment with your bank. The wife responds surprised, I didn't know it was acceptable for a preacher to speak that way. Take my advice — I'm not using it.
Bombs don't kill people, explosions kill people. Mother: How was school today, Patrick? Sincerely, James Pearson One Wednesday Martin demanded of his boss, 'I must have a pay rise. Funny One Liners When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start looking like nails. The last thing I want to do is insult you. Enjoy laughing out loud to all these hilarious one liners.
She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. So I bought 100 copies of Goldfinger. There is something about comedy that always gets to us, doesn't it? Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. I could talk about classic card games all day. How many of you believe in telekinesis? Then I realized they can handle it themselves.
Thank you in advanse fore yore anser. Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it. Here you will find different jokes, riddles, pick up lines and insults. That means i talk down to people. Where the babies come from, darling. I can Type real quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting.
Why are eggs not very much into jokes? My first boyfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months. What are your other two wishes? But since I possess no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage. A pastor hears this and asks, Why are you calling them 'dam fish. The redhead replies, She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull. The problem with sex in the movies is, that the popcorn usually spills.
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth, I can start imeditely. Like the way an Irish person or a Scottish person would say that the band Snow Patrol are boring but an Eskimo has a hundred words for how crap Snow Patrol are. A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory. With such a varied and promising field of candidates it is impossible for me to accept all refusals. What do you call a bull that likes taking a nap? So deaf people can enjoy them too. If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms. Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.